Spike Milligan

Philip Le Barr,
Was knocked down by a car,
On the road to Mandalay.
He was knocked down

I must go down to the sea again,
to the lonely sea and the sky;
I left my shoes and socks there -
I wonder if they're dry?

Through every nook and every
The wind blew in on poor old
Around her knees, into each ear(And up her nose as well,
I fear)All through the night the wind grew

This population
Said Peter to St.
Is really getting far too
Just look at the crowd in the hall.

Elephants are contagious!
Be careful how you tread.
An Elephant that's been trodden on Should be confined to bed!
Leopards are contagious too.

My sister Laura's bigger than
And lifts me up quite easily.
I can't lift her,
I've tried and tried;

'Help, help, ' said a man. 'I'm drowning.''Hang on, ' said a man from the shore.'Help, help, ' said the man. 'I'm not clowning.''Yes,
I know,
I heard you before.
Be patient dear man who is drowning

Maveric
Had Rumbling
That thundered in the night.
It shook the bedrooms all

If I could write
Like leaves on an autumn forest floor,
What a bonfire my letters would make.
If I could speak words of water

The people who
On the
Stand around in bundles of
When asked how it

What happened to the boy I was?
Why did he run away?
And leave me old and thinking,
There'd been no yesterday?

In the land of the Bumbley
The People are red white and blue,
They never blow noses,
Or ever wear closes,

Young are our
Like babies they
The wombs they blest
Not healed

American
Never remove their
When investigating
In other people's flats.

Said Hamlet to Ophelia,
I'll draw a sketch of thee,
What kind of pencil shall I use?2B or not 2B?

I was thinking of letters,
We all have a lot in our lifeA few good - a few
But mostly run of the mill-I suppose that's my
For writing to run of the mill people.

Unaware of my crime
they stood me in the dock.
I was sentenced to life….
without her.

Why is there no
To Porridge in our land?
If it's good enough to eat,
It's good enough to stand!

Orstralia –
We think of you each
Orstralia –
At work or at play.

Things that go 'bump' in the
Should not really give one a fright.
It's the hole in each
That lets in the fear

Look at all those
Jumping in their cage.
Why don't they all go out to
And earn a decent wage?

What are vices?
Catching
And eating mices!

So they bought
And kept you in
Very good
Central

Somewhere at some
They committed themselves to
And so,
I was!