It was Christmas Day in the
In Spain in Penninsular War,
And Sam Small were cleaning his musketA thing as he'd ne're done before.
They'd had 'em inspected that
And Sam had got into disgrace,
For when sergeant had looked down the barrelA sparrow flew out in his face.
The sergeant reported the
To Lieutenant Bird then and there.
Said Lieutenant 'How very disgusting'The Duke must be told of this 'ere.'The Duke were upset when he
He said, 'I'm astonished,
I am.
I must make a most drastic
There'll be no Christmas pudding for Sam.'When Sam were informed of his
Surprise, rooted him to the spot.'Twas much worse than he had expected,
He thought as he'd only be shot.
And so he sat cleaning his
And polishing barrel and butt.
While the pudding his mother had sent him,
Lay there in the mud at his foot.
Now the centre that Sam's lot were
Ran around a place called Badajoz.
Where the Spaniards had put up a
And ooh …! what a bastion it was.
They pounded away all the
With canister, grape shot and ball.
But the face of the bastion defied them,
They made no impression at all.
They started again after
Bombarding as hard as they could.
And the Duke brought his own private
But that weren't a ha'pence o' good.
The Duke said, 'Sam, put down thy
And help me lay this gun true.'Sam answered, 'You'd best ask your
From them as you give pudding to.'The Duke looked at Sam so reproachful'And don't take it that way,' said he.'Us Generals have got to be
It hurts me more than it did thee.'Sam sniffed at these words kind of sceptic,
Then looked down the Duke's private gun.
And said 'We'd best put in two charges,
We'll never bust bastion with one.'He tipped cannon ball out of
He took out the wadding and all.
He filled barrel chock full of powder,
Then picked up and replaced the ball.
He took a good aim at the
Then said 'Right-o,
Duke, let her fly.'The cannon nigh jumped off her trunnions,
And up went the bastion, sky high.
The Duke, he weren't 'alf
He danced around trench full of glee.
And said, 'Sam, for this gallant action.
You can hot up your pudding for tea.'Sam looked 'round to pick up his
But it wasn't there, nowhere about.
In the place where he thought he had left it,
Lay the cannon ball he'd just tipped out.
Sam saw in a flash what 'ad happened:
By an unprecedented mishap.
The pudding his mother had sent him,
Had blown Badajoz off map.
That's why fuisilliers wear to this momentA badge which they think's a grenade.
But they're wrong … it's a brass reproduction,
Of the pudding Sam's mother once made.
